The Rere Platform

G.R.A.T.I.T.U.D.E

2018 was quite frankly the best year of my life till this year 2019, which will be even better. I started the year finding out I had a health condition. It scared the hell out of me, especially because the doctors said “Oh, there is no cure for this except you have surgery.” Strangely enough, the worry did not last, I felt peace knowing the ultimate Doctor was my father. I prayed just one prayer, “God if you love me as much as I know you do, don’t let them have to cut me.” And true to his word, like magic I was made whole and well. If only I knew the awesome plans waiting ahead for me.

Prior to that I had been hoping to get this particular job for the longest time, somehow someway when I was not expecting, this job came through. All of a sudden it looked like Rere was special, as if I knew more than my mates. During the course of the year, I kept super late nights because of work and despite Lagos not being the safest of places, I got home safe each night. At every turn, I had angels sent to help me out of every situation that seemed like a big deal. That definitely was not my doing, a superior power was watching over me.

In the same 2018, I started and completed a self-sponsored 6-months branding course, which when I started, it felt like I was wasting my time. Today I can proudly say that knowledge from that course which I applied in my business (@footwearbyrere) has yielded plenty fruits. One thing stood out, and that was the fact that I was a benefactor of God’s grace. I fell, I stood, I learnt and I grew. All I had to do was want something enough and tell him, he’ll hand it to his baby girl.

In everything I learnt to be grateful, to give thanks, no matter what. It was in the tiny things, I found my own testimony. There were some low points, times when I cried and just questioned everything in my life but the good definitely outweighed the bad. I learnt some valuable lessons in 2018, some of which include that in order to live the best out of life you need to be true to yourself. Be real to your heart, because the moment you start to lie to yourself then you deprive your soul of peace. The right people will stay, the right people will be attracted to you because you are proud of who you are. You’re not too weird, or too quiet, or too ambitious or too fiery, nobody should be allowed to make you feel like your dreams are too small. As long as you stay humble, you believe and you are not too scared to embrace your imperfections, things definitely will work for good.

My biggest lesson of the year was realizing that most of us live our lives for other people. Our state of mind and choices are based on the simple question “What Will People Say?” We make decisions as simple as the clothes we wear, the friendships we keep, and the food we eat, based on the fact that other people are watching and listening. You forget that your happiness should be the only thing that matters, your ability to make decisions and be proud of them. Choices you can stand by and defend because you know it is really what you want, not what someone else wants for you.

The goal for 2019 is to stay happy and spread happiness. Frustration, confusion, sadness, fear, all those things come into play the moment you start doing things to get approval and acceptance. When you try to tailor your choices to what the society expects of you, that’s when things start to go wrong. There are only 2 people you owe anything; the Creator who gave you life and YOU. Everybody will not approve of your choices or even your lifestyle, so why care? At the end, they are all just selfish people looking for what is in it for them, your life is yours for a reason.

2019 is for doing things that make you stand out,

It’s for embracing the fact that you are Abnormal (Above Normal),

2019 is for multiplying, being a source,

It’s the year to make life changing choices, the time to forget the meaning of the word regret,

Its 365 new opportunities, 12 new chapters and YOU are your own author.

Embrace who you are and enjoy the best out of life.

Lastly, what do you want to be remembered for in 2019?

The answer to that question lies in the decisions you make all year long.

I wish you all the best and I love you.

Cheers to 2019!!

Love, Rere.

2Comments

, by The Rere

In Africa, attitude

Discovering Yourself - Who Are You?

Look who came back from her leave of absence. No more excuses, I’ll just get to it because now it’s time to find out who you are and what makes you, you!

To truly love yourself and know your worth, you have to first know yourself. Discovering and exploring yourself is truly an enlightening process that we should all take part of. Contrary to popular opinion, you don’t need someone else to tell you who you are because no one knows you better than you.

The first thing that needs to happen for you to discover yourself is getting away from your daily routine. There is something about the things you do constantly that stops you from seeing the “difference” in the actions you take. So you need to break away from your routine life, do something unusual to trigger that knowledge you need.

Albert Einstein discovered the theory of relativity while he absorbed himself in his own the world. He was in complete solitude. It is said that he was standing by a train track watching the train traveling past him. Many of us don’t know how to actually be by ourselves and enjoy solitude. We must sha be going somewhere, or visiting someone.It was at that point he realized that to him the train was moving, but to the people on the train, he was the one that seemed to move.

Sometimes people are scared to ask themselves some questions majorly because they are running away from the truth. One thing about asking the right question is that your mind will actually begin to search for the right answer. Let me share this example, the whole asoebi craze in Nigeria has now become a steady and normal thing. When my friends send me their asoebi price, I ask myself Rere does buying this asoebi really certify that you love this person. Because honestly, my buying or not buying does not say that I love you less or more. And truth be told whether I stretch my budget to buy or not the wedding will still happen. Then I told myself a simple truth, “I don’t need the asoebi to feel among, I can still look good anyway.”

After changing your routine and asking yourself certain questions, you have to realize who you are by looking past who you want to be. Many of us only live our lives for other people, either because that’s what they will approve of or because that’s what every other person is doing.

When we should analyze where we are in life, what we have done right and what can be done better. Never forget that the more you stay true to yourself, the easier your life will be. As I sign out let me leave you with the knowledge that, without God this whole plan might seem impossible – if anyone should know you, it’d be Him.

“Knowing others is intelligence; knowing yourself is true wisdom. Mastering others is strength; mastering yourself is true power.” – Lao Tzu.

Leave me your thoughts on how you want to discover yourself…

0Comments

, by The Rere

In Africa, Blogger

Who Am I?

Hey,

How are you doing? How is life treating you? As for me I really enjoyed this Eid-el-fitr holiday because it helped me regroup and refresh, and now I feel as good as new. Well, some days before the holiday my sister called me to tell me how one of her friends died in a ghastly car accident just that afternoon. I was shocked, that a 21 year old final year student who had not truly started living his life was so suddenly gone. Someone who left home thinking he will be back to probably play video games or catch up with friends. I was sad, mostly because it kept hammering in my head that this guy had just missed the chance of living a full life. I kept asking, is this how people die?

Please bear in mind that I am not here to judge him nor dissect how he lived his life. It is not my place to imagine what if he lived his life some type of way or criticize what he could have done better. The good part is that this guy’s death led me to something. I am going to call it the MYSELF SERIES. The more I look, the more I realize most people are just existing and not living. Many of us cannot say, this is who I am, this is why I am here. Personally I am still on the road to discovering myself and truly understanding why I am here, so that it does not become a case of Rere just occupied space on earth. Finding and understanding one’s self is something every individual should do regardless of your age.

Let me just drop it here now that age is truly just a number. Your age does not necessarily mean you are well grounded or mature enough to handle every situation. I understand the place of respect in our society but I think it is time we realize that we should be respected for what we bring to the table and not just how old we are.

The greatest and most important adventure of our lives is discovering who we really are. Yet, so many of us walk around either not really knowing or listening to an awful inner critic that gives us all the wrong ideas about ourselves. We mistakenly think of self-understanding as self-indulgence, and we carry on without asking the most important question we’ll ever ask: Who am I really?

When many people hear “finding yourself” the first thing that crosses their mind is what do I like? what are my hobbies? But honestly it dives deeper than that, it is a process that we all need to go through because it affects every single area of our lives. In order to be the most valuable person to the world around us, the best partner, parent, friend etc., we have to first know who we are, what we value and, in effect, what we have to offer.

The Myself Series is going to be as follows:

- Discovering yourself

- Embracing yourself

- Living the Dream

It is time to understand that maybe it is okay to be selfish about some aspects of your life. When you understand who you are and what you stand for, then it becomes easy for you to offer spice and sauce to the people around you. Then you will become that person everyone respects and holds in high esteem.

What my mum told me as a child is true; the way you carry yourself is the way people will address you. But if you don’t know yourself, how can you carry yourself?

Don’t be an empty vessel.

0Comments

, by The Rere

In Africa, Blogger

Expectations, Expectations...

Hi,

Been a minute, Lol!

Somehow you would have to forgive my disappearing acts, but then I have discovered than I am not one to just wake and churn out crappy stuff. I actually enjoy making sense. I missed you guys, who missed me? I am grateful for everyone that keeps messaging me to ask for my next post. You are my true inspiration.

I’ll be talking about expectations today. Over the past few weeks, I have been privileged to be in some amazing gatherings. Some I want to tell you about but then I know I might not fully pass the message the way I heard it. Which will be sad, but trust me I will try.

Why do we expect soooooo much from everything around us??

The world is guided by people that feel so arrogantly entitled to getting things when they want it. Life is a gift to mankind but humans are cocky to the point where we sleep at night and automatically expect we will wake up the next morning. Without even stopping to think about the mechanics behind it or who/what makes it happen.

Research has shown that the rate of depression and suicide has increased by 50% over the past 5 years alone. This stat puts a hamper on my mood because after thinking it through I realized the foundation problem is “Expectations”. Why are your expectations so high? Why do you intentionally mount pressure on people?

The society expects the world of you, so much so that you push yourself till you break into tiny pieces. Every parent expects their child to go to school, get good grades, then get a good job, get married and stay responsible. As a child, you expect your parents to always be there for you attending to your every whim, pay your bills till you can take care of yourself and just generally set a great example for you.

Now the problem is nothing ever goes as planned. Then we start to feel disappointed, which turns into resentment because expectations are premeditated resentments. Does it now make sense why the rate of depression is so high?

So many friendships, relationships and marriages fail because individuals fail to realize no two persons are the exact same. Stop expecting your friend to like the same music you like, stop arguing with your boyfriend/girlfriend because they don’t see things the way you do. If 6 is written on a sheet, one person will see it as 6 while another will see it as 9. No one is wrong, they just see it from different points.

When we realize we are not all the same, we have the power to conquer two things; - Competition & Comparison.

The choice is yours, do you want to continue living life hoping that people live up to your expectation of them? Or would you rather love life by expecting nothing and appreciating people when they do things? My take would be that you give people the chance of being themselves around you, because…

… Peace begins when expectation ends…

5Comments

, by The Rere

In Africa, Blogger

Stay Strong

I have a very strong feeling, to encourage someone, who is just on the verge of giving up. Lately I see many young people actually trying, making efforts to be better, to do better. To be different, but it seems as if all their efforts are just in vain. Sadly it seems like nothing is working, like things are only getting harder. I don’t know how all of a sudden, everywhere I turn I see sad, almost depressed young adults. Little wonder why the rate of depression has increased over time.

Someone reading this might have reached the point where all you are thinking is “I’m tired” “I can’t continue” “The pressure is too much” “Why are things not working for me” “Why is my own different?”

Never forget that, God never gives you more than you can handle. If you are faced without something that seems too big for you to carry, be rest assured that He considers you strong enough to overcome. Why are things not working out for you? It turns out that even brilliant, highly accomplished people have felt this exact way at some point or the other.

One thing to avoid though is complaining, stop comparing yourself to the young guy you see buying houses. In fact, decades of research on achievement suggests that successful people reach their goals not simply because of who they are, but more often because of what they do.

What should you be doing differently?

1. Get specific. When you set yourself a goal, try to be as specific as possible. “Lose 5kg” is a better goal than “lose some weight,” because it gives you a clear idea of what success looks like. Knowing exactly what you want to achieve keeps you motivated until you get there. Also, think about the specific actions that need to be taken to reach your goal. Just promising you’ll “eat less” or “sleep more” is too vague — be clear and precise. “I’ll start writing a book, this weekend” leaves no room for doubt about what you need to do.

2. Seize the moment to act on your goals. Given how most Nigerian parents are, most of us are scared to pursue what we truly love. Just because your mum has always dreamt of her son being a Lawyer doesn’t mean her son is destined to actually be a Lawyer. Accepted the music industry might be full or is it fashion? But never forget that the sky is wide enough for everyone to fly. I am not saying copy someone else because you think there’s money there. I am saying do something you are truly passionate about, you don’t have to wear a suit and tie to be successful. Rest assured your parents might not support you at first but if they see that truly you love what you want to do, any sane parent will support eventually.

3. Be a realistic optimist. When you are setting a goal, by all means engage in lots of positive thinking about how likely you are to achieve it. Believing in your ability to succeed is enormously helpful for creating and sustaining your motivation. But whatever you do, don’t underestimate how difficult it will be to reach your goal. Most goals worth achieving require time, planning, effort, and persistence. Studies show that thinking things will come to you easily and effortlessly leaves you ill-prepared for the journey ahead, and significantly increases the odds of failure.

4. Have grit. Grit is a willingness to commit to long-term goals, and to persist in the face of difficulty. Grit predicts which runner will make it to the finish line. In fact, grit even predicts which round of contestants will make it to at the Scripps National Spelling Bee.

The good news is, if you aren’t particularly gritty now, there is something you can do about it. People who lack grit more often than not believe that they just don’t have the innate abilities successful people have, (which is a big lie). If this statement describes your own thinking …. Well, there’s no way to put this nicely: you are wrong and silly to even think that. You have to realise that how your future turns out, lies solely in your hands. Each of us have to be accountable for the abilities God has put in us.

5. Focus on what you will do, not what you won’t do. Do you want to successfully lose weight, quit smoking, or put a lid on your bad temper? Then plan how you will replace bad habits with good ones, rather than focusing only on the bad habits themselves. Research on thought suppression (e.g., “Don’t think about white bears!”) has shown that trying to avoid a thought makes it even more active in your mind. The same holds true when it comes to behavior — by trying not to engage in a bad habit, our habits get strengthened rather than broken.

Don’t cry, don’t be weary and don’t be sad. Just hang on and stay strong. Ending your life isn’t the best option. Giving up isn’t also an option.

Find a way to stay happy, to be happy.

Live, Laugh & Love.

Your best is yet to come.

Feel free to send me an email if you want to talk to someone, it's okay to be needy, it's also okay if you want to stay anonymous. Reach out, i'm available anytime.

0Comments

, by The Rere

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Who Am I?

Expectations, Expectations...

Stay Strong

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